The Topic:
Mom, Dad, I have to tell you...

The Question:
 Boolean

What I'm about to say will come as a shock. I'm sure you never expected it to happen to me. But it's becoming more socially acceptable, so I feel I can talk to you openly about it.

Mom...Dad...I'm an engineer.

Responses:
 Mom

No. Not my dear sweet boy.

Dad  

I think you best just go up to your room and pack young man. Because you're moving out of this house! Pronto!

Dad  

And try to contain whatever diseases you people get for the few minutes you're still here.

 Mom

What did we do wrong? I always took him to soccer practice and never left him alone with that--that--that . . . thing for more than three hours a day.

Dad  

I told you we should have never bought that infernal computer. I'm going to go throw it out, too.


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