The Topic:
Organic Theory 214:

The Question:

Theorem: Nipples are made of water

Nipples expand when they are cold.
Water expands when it is cold.
Apply axiom 527: Nothing other than water expands when it is cold

Therefore: Nipples are made of water

 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

Actually, that's quite an interesting theory.

 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

Since our bodies are made of a high percentage of water, it seems possible that parts of our physical manifestation might have higher concentrations of water than others.

 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

To illustrate, my assistant Beaker will have himself hooked up to a pair of electrified nipple clamps as he is submerged in salt water.


Meep! Meep!

 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

Oh therethere Beaker, you have nothing to fear.

Those electric eels swimming in the tank are just there for effect.



 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

It's all done in the name of science, my dear friend.

Think of the glory!



 Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

That's the spirit!

Bring the Northwest's power grid online, and make sure to cut off those ties to California! We're going to need to test this theory thoroughly.

Back to Archive Index

Images © their respective owners. Text © 1999-2001 The Conversatron. For entertainment purposes only.