The Topic:
One of *those* questions...

The Question:
 The Asker

Okay, so here's the deal. I met this girl last year and we became really close friends. At the time, I had a girlfriend and she had a boyfriend. Since then, we've both become single, and we've started to notice each other in a romantic sense. However, she has a twin sister. Her twin sister looks exactly like her, and she hates me. The thing is, I approached her once and accidentally told her how I felt about her sister, thinking that she was the other. At the same time, my twin brother was with her sister, telling her that he hated her. She thought he was I, and started screening her calls. I sent her flowers, but she fed them to her dog. Then my house burned down for dubious reasons (the story is that a lamp had a short in it, but I don't believe that), and since her father is our family's insurance adjuster, we didn't get anything for it. Our premium is going to be ridiculously high now if we ever get a new house, and that's only if my parents don't go to jail for arson and insurance fraud. Then the ninjas came. They relentlessly attack the cardboard box we live in day and night, and we never even see them. It's infuriating. You turn away for a second and a corner is chopped off the box or there are throwing stars buried in the side. And they steal our newspaper every morning. So you can imagine it wasn't much of a surprise when I found out I have testicular cancer. So my question is this: Who would win in a fight between Lester and Milkman Dan?


Huh, wow, it IS one of *those* questions.


That gives me an idea. If any of you readers find yourself typing a question like this, please follow this guy's example and use the subject line "One of *those* questions..." so we can, ah, give it the special attention it deserves.

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