The Topic:
Futility

The Question:
 Ming

Why won't anyone listen to my pleas for help?

Responses:
 Fry

Umm....I give up. Why?

 Ming

I think It has to do with the fact that they all hate me.

 Fry

Seems to make sense to me.

 Ming

argh. The fact remains that I still need help. I need someone out there who DOESN'T hate me, or at least someone who does hate me but is altruistic enough to put aside his petty feelings and help out someone in need.

Bender  

Yeah! Good luck with that!

 Leela

What seems to be the trouble?

Bender  

Aww, we're not gonna be nice, are we? We just did that last month.

 Ming

Well I could use a lot of help really.

First up, how the heck do I deduce Latitude and Longitude down to the exact minutes and seconds on a 7.5 minute map?

Oh, and beyond that how do I get my life out of the horrible sinkhole its currently in?

 Professor Farnsworth

Well, the key to remember is that they are called 7.5 minute maps because one side length of 7.5 minute quadrangle is approximately 8.426 miles, which is very close to the distance of 7.5 minute arc on the earth surface (8.637 miles).

 Professor Farnsworth

With this information, it should be easy to deduce based on measurements on the map. Of course, you can also take two known latitudes or longitudes, subtract, divide, and have a good idea of the distance of single minute of arc. There are probably better ways to do this, but alas, they were all lost during the great map burnings of 2802.

Fry  

Huh...I would have thought you'd have said something like "7.5 minutes maps are obsolete now that we have instant maps."

 Professor Farnsworth

Oh my, yes, you would have thought that.

 Ming

Thanks Proffessor F! Who says the old aren't usefull anymore?

 Professor Farnsworth

Oh, just about everyone I'm afraid.

Oh dear.


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